On Valentine’s Day, we celebrate love in all of its many forms and guises.
When someone we love dies, the love is still there. We still feel it, we still carry it within us. We just don’t know quite where to direct it anymore and so it has nowhere to go, no place to call home, no space to grow and reciprocate. We are left bereft. The author Chloe Frayne summed it up when she said “Loving you changed my life. It should come as no surprise that losing you has done the same.”
A funeral gives us the opportunity to say a meaningful and personal goodbye, but it also gives us an opportunity to show and express love. Not just in acknowledgement of the person who has died, but in support of those left behind.
When people come together and stand united, anything is possible. A funeral is a special moment in time for it acknowledges life and love, it recognises how that person has enriched the lives of others, it marks the closing of a chapter and the ending of an era. But it is also a rite of passage for those left behind, a window in time and a change in the order of things.
A funeral marks an ending, but also a new beginning. It gives us the opportunity to connect, or to reconnect, for everyone has taken the time to put everything else aside, to stop the clocks in their world, to come together in unity, in love, in sorrow and in honour of the person who has died. People come, not only to be able to say goodbye, but equally important, in support of that person’s family and of each other. Although we cannot change what has happened, collectively we can fill the funeral space to the roof with our love and compassion and surround each other with it to show our support. We can feel the love, for a beautiful funeral will stay with you always. As the great writer Maya Angelou said “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
Perhaps you have lost a loved one, either recently or in the past, but didn’t get the chance to say goodbye properly. Perhaps you are having to face an imminent parting, or want to plan your own farewell. Whatever your circumstances, if you want to be able to say goodbye properly, then please get in touch.