They say you never forget your first. I have now embarked on my journey as a funeral celebrant and have conducted a number of funerals. All of the people for whom I have had the honour of writing and conducting their service, and the families who have trusted me to do so, will stay with me always. As will those yet to come.
But the first was extra special. A man born in a time of world war who worked hard all his life to provide for his family and who gave his two children the freedom and confidence to make their own way in this world on their terms – as he himself did. A man who loved flying with a life affirming passion and who felt truly at home in the sky. A man who hated being grounded by the infirmities of old age. As Leonardo da Vinci famously said “For once you have tasted flight you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skywards, for there you have been and there you will long to return.” As we waited outside the chapel and just as the hearse arrived, a Spitfire flew overhead before soaring up into the clear blue sky. The timing couldn’t have been better and it was a very special moment.
I felt privileged to help this man’s family as they prepared to say goodbye and to do so in a unique and personal farewell. To recognise his life and all he had been to those who loved him and who would miss him in a myriad of ways. When we lose someone we love, the agony of grief is just so raw – the kind of pain we would not wish on our worst enemy – and those who grieve tread a lonely path that they must walk alone as their relationship with the person who has died is unique to them. No-one can take that pain away, all I can do as a celebrant is try and make that walk a little easier some days. To let people know that, although they are alone in their grief, someone walks alongside them to try and shoulder some of the burden, if only for a little while. Someone who will do their utmost to make the pain of parting a true reflection of what they want for their loved one, and the start of their healing journey and transition to continuing their life without them.
I would like to take this opportunity to thank the family for trusting me with their dad and also Co-Op Funeralcare Cambridge for taking that leap of faith. I am proud to have been a member of their amazing, professional team and to work with them in supporting families at such a sad and challenging time.